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Whenever I say your name

Category: Adult, Drama, Angst
Rating: PG-13 to NC-17
Pairing: Justin/ Iris
Warnings: sexual situations and graphic sex, brother/ sister romance
Spoilers: Anything from "After the ball is over" on is fair game
Disclaimer: All Carnivale characters are the property of Dan Knauf and HBO. I derive no profit from this and no copyright infringement is intended.

Chapter 1

Denial isn't just a river in Egypt

Iris Crowe was in ecstasy. She loved the feeling of the strong hands pinning hers against the pillows, the weight of the body over hers, the feeling of being  totally and completely dominated. "Justin..." she murmured softly.

She was dragged roughly from this wonderful dream by the ringing of the alarm clock. It was time to get up for church. Glaring, she reached over and slapped the offending thing off. "Enough already. I hear you." Iris sat up slowly, stretching. Her body still tingled slightly.
Five minutes later she was in the shower, letting the warm water wake her up.

She ran her soapy hands over her body imagining they were his. "Stop that." an inner voice chided. Iris picked up her washcloth and furiously scrubbed the areas she had just been touching in a futile attempt to wash away her feelings. When she stopped her skin was red and raw and tingly. Suitably cleansed, Iris turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. As she reached for a towel and wrapped it around herself she caught a glimpse of Justin passing by the slightly open door. She felt his eyes on her for several seconds and a flush ran up her body from head to toe. What was wrong with her? She shouldn't be having these kinds of feelings about her brother.

A few minutes later Iris was dressed and heading downstairs. Justin was in the living room waiting for her, bible in hand."Ready to go?" he asked. A soft smile played across his lips. Iris nodded and they left the house.

"Let us pray..."
Iris watched from her seat near the front of the church as Justin strode confidently to the pulpit. He looked so tall and strong and proud standing there in his cassock. There was an intensity that just radiated from every line of him. It made her weak just watching him like this sometimes. Justin looked out at his congregation, taking in the whole assemblage while at the same time making it seem he was looking at each person individually. Folding his hands contemplatively, he began to speak.

Iris remembered the first service Justin had led after being ordained a minister, and how proud she had felt that day. He had looked so handsome all dressed in black and had held the peoples' rapt attention with the fiery sermon he preached. Iris had felt the stirring of feelings toward him that were more than normal sisterly affection. She had kept them suppressed that day, as she was trying to do now. Iris glanced around the church aware of the disapproving looks being directed at the large migrant family in the back. She felt angered and frustrated by this seeming intolerance. Wasn't everyone equal in the eyes of the Lord? She firmly believed that and knew Justin did too.

Chapter 2
Guilt and remembrance

Too bad everyone didn't feel that way Iris thought as she stood in the kitchen several hours later pouring lemonade and listening to Justin argue with Carroll Templeton. She could partly understand the businessman's attitude. He had never known poverty or want, never had to struggle to provide for his family. Technically, neither had she and Justin. In Russia their family had never been wealthy, but they were comfortable.They always had clothes to wear and food on the table. Iris did understand what it was like to have your world turned upside down and your family torn apart, what it was like to be alone with nowhere to go. It had been like that for her and Justin after the train crash until Norman found them and saved  them. Iris understood Templeton's attitude. That didn't mean she liked it. Sighing, she picked up the two full glasses of lemonade from the counter and walked into the parlor.
Several hours later Iris sat on the couch sewing and watching as Justin paced. "Would you mind sitting down? You're wearing me out." She asked him, forcing a smile on her face."I have a lot on my mind right now. It helps me think."

That was true. Justin often paced while working on his sermons or when preparing for a meeting of the parish council. It still bothered her though. She wished there was something she could do to help ease his troubles. Iris was sure he was still replaying in his mind what had happened earlier with Templeton. She looked up from her work as Justin suddenly stopped, walked over and got his jacket and slipped it on. The determination in his eyes and the set of his jaw was unmistakable as he headed for the door. "Where are you going?" Iris asked. "Out." Justin replied tersely. She knew better than to press him for more when he was in this kind of mood. She watched tensely as Justin picked up his bible and strode out the door. What was bothering him? Iris wished he would talk to her. Maybe there was something she could do to help.

She thought back to the previous Sunday and what had happened when Justin had talked with Eleanor after the service. She knew how he had made the migrant woman vomit coins. Iris believed Justin knew too, even if he wouldn't admit it. The "abilities" he'd had all his life were making their presence known again after being buried for almost forty years. She thought she had seen another display of them that afternoon.

When she had brought the lemonade in Justin and Mr. Templeton had both been standing in the center of the room. Templeton had had a look of shock and sadness on his face. He had accepted the offered lemonade, sipped it woodenly, and left shortly after. Iris didn't know exactly what had happened between him and Justin, but they appeared to have come to some kind of agreement. Spoken or unspoken. Justin hadn't given her any details and she knew better than to push him. "Your brother is very special." Iris remembered her mother telling her one day as they stood looking down at baby Alexei asleep in his crib. "What do you mean, Momma?" she had asked. "Alexei is different, Irina. He has certain "gifts". " was her mother's cryptic answer. Iris still didn't know if she was deliberately being vague or really didn't know any more. As they grew up she realized the truth in her mother's words. She also came to realize that she and Alexei had a relationship that was different from that of most brothers and sisters.

They had always been very close. She remembered how a five year old Alexei would creep into her room and climb into bed with her when there was a thunderstorm and how he loved to lie with his head in her lap. She hadn't realized her feelings went beyond sisterly affection until one day when she was 22 and he was 16.

She had just returned from a disastrous date and was crying in her room when Alexei found her there. "What's the matter, Irina?" he had asked her. "Billy broke up with me. He says kissing me is like kissing a cold fish." Billy Miles. At the time she had thought he was wonderful. Now she wondered what she could have seen in him. "I'm sure you don't kiss like a fish." Alexei had answered. "You're my brother. Of course you'll say that." Iris had replied. "Let me kiss you and you'll see what I mean." They had kissed then, and not chastely either. She remembered the thrill that went through her when he took her in his arms, and how she had to stand on her tiptoes to kiss him.(even then he was a good bit taller than her.) When they broke the kiss they were both gasping for breath. "That seemed pretty good to me." Alexei said. Iris blushed softly. They had heard Norman come home then and Alexei hurried back to his room. Nothing else was said about what happened and Iris successfully suppressed her feelings for her brother until 7 years later when he was ordained a minister.

It was a beautiful day in May. After the service there was a brunch in Justin's honor. Looking for him in the house and not seeing him she went outside and found him sitting on a bench on the back patio. "What are you doing out here? The party's inside." she had asked, thinking how handsome he looked in his cassock. "I just needed some air." Justin replied. He stood and went over to her. "I've missed you, Irina". He took her hands in his. "I've missed you too, Alexei."

On the couch remembering, Iris squirmed feeling the first tendrils of desire building in her lower belly. She felt guilty about these thoughts but couldn't stop remembering what happened next.
Justin had pulled her against him, and they were soon kissing passionately. His hands squeezed her bottom through the silky fabric of her dress and she ground against him. Too soon, he pulled away from her. "Irina please forgive me. We shouldn't..." He said, still breathing heavily. Iris knew he was right, knew what would happen if they were caught together like this. That didn't mean she had to like it though. Iris stopped sewing. She let a hand slip under her skirt. "Alexei..." She sighed as she began to stroke herself, first through the silk of her undergarments, then under it.

On the porch, she and Justin straightened their clothes and went back to the party. Later that night lying in her bed she soothed herself, her face pressed against the pillows to stifle her moans.

Iris leaned her head back and closed her eyes. Her legs spread and her fingers began to move more firmly against her heated flesh. She thought about the previous night's dream and a soft moan escaped her lips. She was lost in the pleasure she was feeling, her ardor only dampened by the thought that Justin could walk in at any minute. Iris pressed her head against the back of the couch. Her eyes were still closed and her face was turned upward as if in prayer.It was however, a very different rapture she was seeking. Soft sounds escaped her lips and she arched against  the cushions. As she reached the pinnacle she lost awareness of everything around her.Sighing she opened her eyes and let her hand slip from under her skirt. Iris's heartrate began to slow and pleasure began to be replaced with guilt. Glancing at the door she stood and went upstairs. Iris walked to Justin's room, jumping slightly at the creak of a floorboard even though there was no one to hear it. She knelt by the bed and pulled out the suitcase that was hidden underneath. Glancing surreptitiously at the door she opened it and removed the whip that was coiled inside. Taking its solid weight in her hands, she stood and went to her own room. Once there she removed her dress and knelt by her bed in her slip. Taking a deep breath she wrapped her hand around the handle of the whip. "Please forgive me." she prayed, letting the rough leather smack against her skin. "I have sinned." whack "Give me strength Lord" whack "Help me to resist these unclean urges." whack Iris winced at every slap of the whip against her tender flesh. Justin did this regularly. She didn't know how he stood it. Once she was satisfied with her penance Iris took the whip back to Justin's room and put it away.Back in her room she could still feel the bite of the leather on her back and shoulders as she dressed again. It was getting towards evening. She wondered when Justin would be home.

Chapter 3
In dreams

The room was completely white, the light blinding. Justin tried to move his arms and legs and soon realized that he couldn't. Thick straps held his limbs immobile, pinning him to the table he was lying on. White coated figures moved in the distance. Turning his head he could see a tray of instruments. One of the white coated men removed a large syringe from the tray. He held it up checking its contents, then pulled the plunger to remove any air bubbles from inside. The doctor reached for Justin's arm and felt for a vein. For the first time Justin could see his face. It was the boy he had seen in his dreams. He raised the syringe and prepared to use it. The liquid inside was blue. Justin cried out and sat up in bed. It was just a dream. He had dreamt of the asylum since returning home but never like this. His heart still beating fast Justin climbed out of bed and left his room. As he padded silently down the hallway towards the stairs he heard sounds coming from Iris's room. Concerned, he went to her door. His eyes widened as he realized they weren't sounds of pain he was hearing. The door was partially ajar and he peered curiously in. Iris lay on her back in the bed.From the outline under the blankets it appeared her legs were spread. Her head was turned to the side against the pillows and her hands clutched the covers. Soft gasping cries and shuddering moans escaped her lips. "That's some dream she's having" Justin thought. He wasn't sure how long he stood there watching his sister writhe in ecstasy. Finally he managed to pull himself away and go downstairs.
Several moments later Justin was seated in his favorite chair with his Bible and a glass of milk.
Iris stretched on the soft carpet, straining against the weight covering and anchoring her."Tell me you want me, Irina" her lover whispered huskily in her ear. His mouth slipped lower lapping at her collarbone and the hollow of her throat. "I want you, Alexei." Iris sighed. Large hands massaged her breasts. "Who do you belong to?" Iris moaned and moved against him. "I belong to you Alexei." He smiled. "That's right. You do." Iris's reply was cut off with a sharp  oan as Justin pressed into her.They rocked together, moving like two currents of one swell. Iris soon felt herself moving towards the edge. "Alexei." she gasped, clutching at his back. Suddenly her eyes snapped open and she realized she was lying alone in her bed. Iris had the irrational feeling she was being watched. She glanced towards the open door. As expected no one was there. Sighing, she slid a hand under her nightgown to finish what the dream had started.

Downstairs, Justin looked at the Bible open on his lap. His mind kept wandering from the scripture to what he had seen upstairs.
For as long as he could remember he had enjoyed watching Iris when she didn't know he was there. Part of him found it disturbing in its similarity to the skeezy guys who peek in windows while getting themselves off. He thought about it some more then dismissed the idea outright. He was in his own house for goodness sake. Who was to blame him if a door was left ajar or if a mirror was placed in a way that gave him a perfect view of Iris getting out of the shower?And what was wrong with admiring one of God's creations in all its natural glory?
 The first time he had seen Iris naked Justin had been eleven or twelve. The bathroom door had been open to let out excess steam from the shower. He had stayed there for a long time watching her dry off, fascinated by the curves of the female form. That night the whole thing was replayed in his dreams, with several differences. In the dream Iris had turned and seen him standing there. He hurried away to his room and pretended to be engrossed in his homework. "Alexei" He looked up sheepishly at the sound of his name. Iris stood in the doorway dressed in her pink bathrobe. Her hair hung in damp waves to her shoulders. "You're curious about the female body?" she asked, crossing to where he was. "I didn't mean to see" Justin stammered. "It's time you learned a few things." Iris took one of his hands and placed it inside her robe on the rounded curve of her breast."Touch me here Alexei." His trembling fingera explored the maddening softness beneath them. "Irina..."Iris untied the belt around her waist letting the robe fall open."Look at me Alexei" He did so hesitantly. Iris reached for the waistband of Justin's pants and began to unbutton them."Irina what are you..." he gasped as her cool hand made contact with his flesh."I'm going to make you feel so good Alexei" she said in Russian as she began to touch him. The feelings coursing through him were indescribable. Justin threw his head back and closed his eyes. "Irina..." he moaned. When he woke up there was a wet spot at the crotch of his pajamas. Justin had been ashamed and afraid he was going to hell for days afterwards, even after Norman assured him that the type of dream he had had wasn't sinful. He felt that way now thinking about Iris in her bed and wondering what it would be like to be the one making her moan that way.

Feeling sleepy again, Justin closed the Bible and set it back on the end table. When he got upstairs he paused by the door of Iris's room. She was lying on her side facing away from the door. The only sound Justin could hear was the ticking of the alarm clock on the bedside table.

Chapter 4
Banish the past

The next morning Iris stood at the kitchen counter slicing apples for the pie she was making. She thanked God again that Justin had returned home safely. When she had set the fire in the ministry she had never thought it would affect him like it did. A wave of guilt washed over her as she thought back on what she had done. Iris knew she'd never forget the way her heart pounded as she poured gasoline on the floor in the basement of the ministry then threw a lit match on it. She hadn't even looked back as she hurried from the building and got in the car. She also would never forget the look on Justin's face when she informed him of the fire. He had looked like his whole world had just come crashing down. When they returned home he had collapsed silently on the sofa, not even removing his coat. She had sat down next to him and taken him in her arms. Iris remembered him muttering "Why?" and "my dear children." over and over as she stroked his hair and tried to provide what comfort she could.

Iris dropped the knife on the cutting board with a start as Justin came up behind her and brushed a kiss across the top of her head. "Alexei..." she said reproachfully. A shiver ran through her as his hands came to rest on her shoulders. "You're too tense Iris. You need to relax." Iris stepped away from the table and picked up her oven mitts. "You know what we've had to deal with lately. I don't know how you can be so calm all the time." She went to the oven and removed the freshly browned pie crust. Justin sniffed the air appreciatively. "It smells like Heaven in here." Iris felt another shiver go through her, this time all the way to her nether regions. Why did Justin have this effect on her? She remembered the dream she had had the night before and couldn't keep from blushing. "Iris?" Justin asked. "Go on, get out of here. I have work to do." Iris started layering apples in the pie crust. She looked up with mixed feelings as Justin turned to leave. part of her was glad, while another part wished he would stay and help her "relax". She bit her lip to stifle a moan at the thought of him taking her right there in the kitchen, large hands gripping her waist and bending her over the butcher block. "Stop thinking like that." she scolded herself. Turning her mind to other things, Iris put the finishing touches on the pie and put it in the oven.

Justin sat at the dining room table. His Bible was open in front of him and he was making notes on a pad. He looked up from his work to see Iris sitting on the couch reading a book. He could see the tension in the way she sat ramrod straight and in the distracted way she turned the pages. He was sure the fire at the ministry still weighed heavy on her mind.

Chapter 5
Experimentation

Iris sat stiffly on the couch reading. She dropped her book with a small cry when she felt hands on her shoulders. Looking up she saw Justin standing behind her, smiling. “Alexei...” she protested weakly as he began to massage her tight muscles. “You're too tense.” Justin admonished her softly. “That's not good for you.”

“Alexei..” she said again. “Just close your eyes and try to relax.” Iris's eyes slipped closed and the book dropped from her hands as Justin's skillful fingers sought out and relaxed every knot or kink in her neck and shoulders. “Feels good?” he asked solitiously. “Mmm, yes” she answered. It certainly did. It also seemed like the nerve endings in her shoulders were wired directly to those in her nether regions as each kneading motion of his hands sent a jolt all the way through her. Iris could feel wetness beginning to creep between her thighs. Why did Justin have this effect on her? She squirmed slightly, rubbing against the upholstery of the couch. “Did I hurt you?” Justin asked, concerned. “No.” Iris replied softly. She imagined his hands working their magic on a few other parts of her body and another thrill went through her. “Stop it.” She scolded herself. “You're going to soak your panties if you keep this up.” Just then there was a knock at the door.

Tommy Dolan stood on the front porch of the Crowes neat, white house. He shifted impatiently from one foot to the other as he waited for someone to answer his knock. He still felt a little bad about trying to kiss Iris several days before. He could have sworn she was interested in him. He never would have tried otherwise. “How could I have misread her like that?” he wondered. Just then the door opened. “Mr. Dolan.” Iris said. She surreptitiously straightened her dress. Tommy noticed she looked slightly flushed. Before he could consider that further Justin appeared in the doorway behind Iris. He looked rather annoyed. “What can we do for you?” Iris asked. “I just wanted to let you know that I'll be heading back to Los Angeles tomorrow.” Tommy replied, trying to hide his surprise at seeing Justin there. “Surely you can stay for coffee.” Iris said. “I can.” Tommy answered. A short time later he was seated on the couch in the midst of an uncomfortable conversation with Justin while Iris made coffee in the kitchen. The minister was not taking to his idea of putting his sermons on the air. Tommy was very glad when Iris appeared carrying a tray containing white china cups and saucers and a plate of cookies.”Thank you, Iris.” Justin said as he took a cup. Tommy couldn't help but notice his very unbrotherlike smile. They were interrupted by the ringing of the phone. Tommy visibly relaxed when Justin left the room to answer it. There was just something about the tall man that gave him the creeping willies. Iris sat down across from him. Tommy watched her stirring milk and sugar in her coffee. “Iris, I want to apologize for the other night.” he began uncertainly. “There's nothing to be sorry for, Mr. Dolan” Iris replied. “In fact, I think I should apologize to you. I kind of overreacted to your kiss, treating it like a prelude to assault or something.” Tommy looked surprised. He wasn't expecting that response at all. Iris sipped her coffee and looked across at Tommy. He really was very handsome she realized. Equally important, he wasn't Justin. Remembering her brother's hands on her just prior to Tommy's visit caused a thrill to go through her. Would any other man cause that kind of reaction in her? The kiss the other night had been very pleasant despite her initial reaction. There hadn't been the kind of sparks Justin invoked though.

As if summoned by her thoughts, Justin stepped back into the room. “What are you two conspiring about?” he asked, smiling. “It's nothing.” Iris answered. “I was just asking Mr. Dolan if he'd like to join us for church tomorrow.” Justin nodded .”That's a splendid idea.” Tommy managed to hide his surprise. “I guess I could stay for another day. I'm not in that big of a hurry to get back.”

“Good, then it's settled.” Justin answered.

Later that day Iris uneasily replayed the events of the morning in her mind. She was distinctly uncomfortable and uneasy about the idea that had begun to take shape while she had been talking to Tommy Dolan. Iris hated to even contemplate using him in that way but she needed to know if she would feel anything with another man. Tommy was good looking and she knew he was attracted to her. He seemed like the perfect choice. She just hoped he'd be amenable to the idea. He had seemed a little surprised but not displeased by her response to his apology. It remained to be seen how he'd react this evening. It also remained to be seen how she'd get away without Justin's knowing about it. She still had a little time to figure that out.


Chapter 6
This is only a test

Tommy Dolan sat in the armchair in his hotel room reading the paper. The radio played softly in the background. He thought about his visit with the Crowes that morning. He was puzzled by Iris's seemingly strange behavior and her brother's unnaturally strong hold on her. Iris had definitely been flirting with him, Tommy realized. 

He also realized he didn't mind this seeming 180 degree switch from her previous attitude toward him. He wondered what it would be like to kiss her and hold her somewhere away from Justin's influence. Just then there was a knock at the door. Iris stood there looking slightly flushed and very attractive. “Iris?” Tommy said, both puzzled and pleased to see her. “I wanted to talk to you in private, away from my brother.” she said by way of explanation. “Come in, come in.” Tommy ushered her into his room, pushing down any thoughts about how wrong this was.

After supper Justin had gone out, not telling Iris where he was headed. Relieved at not having to lie to him she had waited a half hour then walked into town to Tommy's hotel. Sitting on the overstuffed sofa she couldn't believe she was actually going through with this, but here she was. “I want to thank you for everything you've done for my brother and me.” she began haltingly. Tommy listened knowing that conversation wasn't the real reason for this visit. That had been made abundantly clear by the look in her eyes and the strutty cock of her legs when she entered the room. “It was my pleasure.” Tommy said, smiling.”What kind of game are you playing?” he thought. Iris's eyes were big and very bright. She licked her lips. “I need you to kiss me again.” she said softly. Tommy moved to the couch. “ Iris..” he began then pulled her to him and kissed her. When they separated they were both gasping for breath. An unspoken understanding passed between Iris and Tommy as they looked into each other's eyes. “No regrets” Iris murmured trailing a fingertip down the buttons of his shirt. “Are you sure about this?” Tommy asked. Iris nodded. She began slowly unbuttoning Tommy's shirt. He pulled her against him, and kissing her again reached for the buttons fastening the top of her dress. Iris squirmed as he pulled the top of her dress down and let his hands explore the swells of her breasts. She imagined the hands were Justin's and felt a wave of wetness between her thighs. “Stop it.” she scolded herself and turned back to the task at hand.

No words were spoken as Iris and Tommy freed themselves from the restraints of their clothes and made their way to the bed. “If you want me to stop, say so now. “ Tommy said huskily as he positioned Iris beneath him. “Don't stop.” she murmured. There was a brief moment of discomfort as he pushed into her. Iris remembered her first time and how it had felt like a knife stabbing into her womb. She had been 21 and her lover had been a young man named Henry who lived three doors down from them. She had gotten through it and subsequent encounters by imagining it was Justin she was making love to. She didn't want to do that now. Tommy kissed her tenderly, his arms cradling her gently. It was the complete opposite of how she imagined Justin touching her would be. She almost wished Tommy would be rougher with her. “Iris...mmm..” Tommy murmured. “Hurt me..I won't mind” Iris said in a half moan. Tommy stopped moving in her and took her face in his hands. She was flushed and her eyes looked like two glittering jewels. “Ohh Iris, I could never hurt you.” Again, so different than Justin. Tommy began thrusting into her again. Iris clutched at his back and turned her face against his shoulder. Images from the previous night's dream went through her mind and her internal muscles tightened involuntarily. Another wave of wetness flowed from her. Tommy groaned and began to push harder and deeper into her. “Iris...Oh, Iris” he gasped. She cried out sharply and dug her nails into his back. She saw Justin's face again but was helpless against the waves of pleasure washing over her and her conflicted feelings. All Iris could do was close her eyes and cry out “Yes, yes...” Tommy heard her cries and felt her go rigid against him. “Oh..my..God” he felt himself hurtling deliciously over the edge.

Afterward they lay entwined in each other's arms breathing fast. “Iris that was...wow” Tommy managed. “Yes it was.” Iris turned and looked at the clock on the bedside table. Justin could be getting home at any time. “Is something wrong? “ Tommy asked. “ I wish I could stay all night, but I can't” Iris said sadly. “Justin, he'll be...it's complicated.” Tommy nodded in understanding. “And it's kind of a long walk.” Iris sat up. “You walked here? “ Tommy asked, surprised. “Justin took the car. It was a lovely night so I thought I'd walk.” There was silence for several moments then Tommy spoke. “I'll drive you home.” He sat up and ran his hands through his hair. “I'm sorry.” Iris said in a voice not much louder than a whisper. She climbed out of bed and began to get dressed. “There's nothing to be sorry for.” Tommy answered. He thought he believed it. What was with Iris and her brother? The way she was acting was like a married woman running around on her husband. He thought about asking her, then dropped the idea almost immediately. He doubted she would tell him much anyway. Tommy got up and put his clothes back on. “I don't blame you if you change your mind about church tomorrow.” Iris said. She was standing at the mirror pinning her hair back up. “Why would I change my mind?” Tommy put on his coat and hat. Several minutes later they were in his sedan heading toward the Crowe residence. Iris was more grateful than she'd admit for not having to walk back home. Her heart began to pound as they approached the house. It was still dark, and Justin's black ford was not parked anywhere she could see. Iris said a silent prayer of thanks. “Here you are, safe and sound.” Tommy said as he pulled up in front of the house. “Thank you, Mr. Dolan...I mean, Tommy.” Iris leaned over and gave him a quick kiss. “See you tomorrow.” She got out of the car. “See you Iris.” He watched her walk into the house, pulling away when he saw the lights come on in the living room.

Iris locked the door then hurried upstairs. She stripped off all her clothes and drew a hot bath. Hopefully Justin wouldn't get home for a while yet. In the steaming water she began to scrub herself roughly. She wanted to wash every trace of Tommy Dolan off her. (It was irrational, but she was afraid Justin would know what she'd done if she didn't.) When she put down the washcloth and rinsed off her skin was raw and pink. Her hips ached and there was a slight soreness deeper inside her. Sighing, she picked up the shampoo bottle and began to wash her hair.

Iris was curled up asleep on the couch when Justin came home some time later. She stirred when he kissed her lightly on the forehead before reaching to turn off the radio. “Mmm, you smell nice.” He murmured. “You're still using that lavender bath oil I like.” He went upstairs to get ready for bed. Iris pulled her robe tighter around her. It felt like she had just dodged a major bullet.

Chapter 7

The next morning Iris sat uneasily in a back pew in First Methodist church. Tommy Dolan sat next to her. Justin was in the sacristy putting on his cassock. She tried to concentrate on the service and Norman Balthus's sermon, but her mind kept going back to the previous evening. Iris was pulled from her thoughts when Justin strode purposefully down the aisle, interrupting the sermon and causing most of the gathered faithful to gasp in surprise. She felt ashamed at the thrill she felt seeing him standing there at the front of the church, so tall and proud in his cassock. He embraced Norman, then began to preach his own sermon. "Brothers and sisters, evil exists..." Iris shivered involuntarily. Justin began to walk back up the center aisle. As he did so he looked directly at various paritioners and announced their most serious sins. Iris's heart began to pound as he neared the back of the church. Justin caught her eye for a moment. Iris had to clasp her hands together to keep them from shaking. Justin smiled and began walking back up to the altar. A palpable feeling of relief flooded over Iris when he reached it. If he had known of them he could have enumerated her sins at length. Justin began to speak of his own sins. Iris wasn't surprised at his admissions. He was still coming to terms with his abilities and what he was. She had done the right thing in keeping it from him. Justin knelt at the altar rail and asked Norman to baptise him. The older minister looked confused But did it, pausing for some reason in the middle of the rite. Several moments later Iris felt compelled to stand up. "Baptise me so that I might join my brother and be saved." Tommy Dolan looked at her curiously. What was she doing?Iris began to walk to the front of the church. She was still a bit sore from the previous night and really hoped it wasn't obvious. She reached the rail and knelt next to Justin. He took her hand and smiled. A thrill like a jolt of electricity went through her. It was closely followed by shame at feeling that way. And in church of all places.
After the service Iris stood outside the church watching as various paritioners went up to talk to Justin and Norman. Tommy came over to her. "What was that all about...the baptisms?" Iris shook her head. " I don't know. Nothing like that ever happened before." After she had gone up to be baptised a number of the faithful had followed suit. She was being completely honest when she said nothing similar had ever occurred. Tommy nodded. He was about to say something about the previous night when Justin approached. The man just had a way of showing up at the most inopportune moments. It was almost like he planned it. "How did you like the service Mr. Dolan?" He asked."It was something..." Tommy said, stepping away from Iris a little. "That it was." Justin smiled. Under his scrutiny Tommy felt like a butterfly specimen immobilized in paraffin wax. All that was missing was the velvet background and pins. "My sister and I are so glad you were able to be with us today." Tommy thought and not for the first time what a good politician Justin would make. "My brother is absolutely right. It was good of you to come." Iris said. She smiled at Justin in a way that made Tommy distinctly uneasy. His relief was palpable as he drove away from the church a few minutes later. The Crowes were certainly an enigma.
Iris stood next to Justin and watched Tommy Dolan drive off. She shivered involuntarily when Justin placed a hand on her arm. "Are you cold, my dear?" He asked,concerned. "No. I'm fine." Iris replied. "Good. Norman a ked us to join him for brunch and of course I accepted." Iris nodded. "Brunch sounds lovely." Justin smiled and took her hand. "Thou shalt be strong." Iris thought to herself as they left the church grounds together..

Chapter 8

The following morning Iris sat in the Crowe living room having coffee with Norman Balthus. Justin wasn't there and she was glad. There were a couple of things she wanted to talk over with Norman and she couldn't do it with her brother present. It seemed Norman also had something to tell her, and her alone. This surprised Iris a bit. She had never known the older man to be secretive about anything. “I think Justin has come under the influence of something evil.” Norman stated. Iris looked surprised. Her look turned to shock when he told what had happened during the “baptism” the day before. What he was suggesting seemed too incredible to be true. As was his next suggestion that an exorcism be performed on Justin.”Exorcism? That's just Papist hocus-pocus.” she replied. She was about to elaborate when Justin entered the room. “Norman. What a pleasant surprise.” His smile was genuine but Iris questioned his intentions. Norman seemed equally ill at ease. He stood, made his apologies for running off, and left. Iris picked up her teacup and took a sip of its lukewarm contents. Justin sat down across from her. “Would you care for some tea?” Iris asked him. “That would be nice.” Iris took a cup off the tray on the coffee table between them and filled it from the still steaming pot. Smiling somewhat tensely she handed the cup to Justin. A thrill went through her as his fingers brushed hers. “Thank you Iris.” Iris refilled her own cup and sat back on the couch. “You and Tommy Dolan seem awfully friendly lately.” Justin said sipping his own tea. It was all Iris could do not to choke on the drink she had just taken. “He's a very pleasant individual. Why shouldn't we be friendly?”She answered somewhat defensively.”I don't trust him.” Justin answered. “I think he'd like to be a little more than just friends. I'd watch my step around him.” Iris set her cup down. “I'm a big girl, Alexei. I can take care of myself.” She found it both infuriating and exciting when Justin got protective like this. “I'm sure you can.” he answered her.

Iris and Tommy Dolan. Justin couldn't get the idea out of his mind as he sat in his study working on a sermon. He couldn't blame the reporter for being interested in Iris. She was a beautiful and charming woman. She was also his and his alone. The thought of Tommy touching his sister made Justin press the pencil to the paper so hard the lead broke cleanly off. He felt angry just contemplating it. More disturbing, he also felt a growing twinge of desire in his belly. He was worrying for nothing though. What he feared was never going to happen. He'd see to that. Justin turned back to his work. He looked up sometime later as he began to hear a sound coming from upstairs. A sound like leather smacking against bare flesh. Justin stood and hurried to the second floor. The sound was coming from Iris's room. Justin slowly opened the door. Iris was kneeling on the rug by her bed clad only in her slip and stockings. She had Justin's whip and was flogging herself. Her eyes widened when she saw him. “Iris. Oh, my dear Iris what are you doing?” Justin exclaimed, his expression a mixture of shock and horror. He wasn't surprised that she knew about the whip, just that she was using it. “Leave me alone, Alexei.” Iris replied. She then made some excuse about offering up her suffering in memory of the children who died in the Dignity Ministry fire. Justin didn't believe her but he didn't press the issue. “You're hurting yourself.” Justin grabbed her wrist with one hand and removed the whip with the other. “Look at you.” He winced looking at the angry red welts that criss-crossed her back. Iris started to cry softly, all the fight gone out of her. Justin took her in his arms, all the while trying to ignore the fact that he could feel her breasts and hips through the thin fabric of her slip. He wanted to push her down on the bed and ravish her right there but settled for just rocking her and stroking her hair.

That evening Justin sat in his easy chair reading his Bible. Iris sat on the couch across from him. Few words had been spoken between them since he had found her engaged in self flagellation earlier in the day. He could tell something was bothering his sister. He just wasn't sure what. Iris had seemed even more distressed when she returned from running errands with Norman. Justin could tell immediately from her walk and the set of her jaw. She had changed clothes and made his supper without saying a word about it and he hadn't felt like pressing her. “Tommy Dolan has been asking questions about the fire.” Iris said. Justin closed the Bible and looked at her. “Let him ask questions.” He responded. “e talked to Norman and put doubts in his mind. He may even go to the Bishop.” Iris seemed even more stressed now. “Let the Bishop investigate. We have nothing to hide.” Iris stood and looked Justin square in the eyes. “Yes we do.” Justin's eyes widened as he realized what she was saying. “Iris?” He stood, looking straight at her. “I did it for you. For the ministry.” Iris said. Justin was speechless. Could she really have been responsible for the fire? Before he realized what he was doing he had her by the arms. Grabbing Iris roughly by the neck he pulled her into a bruising kiss. She gave no resistance at all, wrapping her arms around him. When he broke the kiss Justin roughly pushed her back on the couch then regarded her with a mixture of disgust and desire. Iris looked up at him with wide eyes full of surrender and complicity. “Alexei...” She said softly. Her face was flushed and she was breathing quickly. Justin was on her in a flash. With one hand he pushed up Iris's nightgown and robe, while unbuckling his belt and undoing his pants with the other. Iris didn't resist as he adjusted her underneath him and pulled her undergarments down, groaning when he felt how wet she was already. “Iris” Justin murmured pulling his boxers down quickly. Iris wrapped her arms around him as he pressed himself against her. She gasped sharply as he slid inside with one firm motion. Justin felt like he was watching himself from a distance as he began to pound into Iris. He was aware of her small ,white hands clutching at his back, her sharp cries, and later the pain of her teeth biting down on his shoulder and the spurt of her fluids as she came. Justin continued driving into her, pinning her against the couch until his own climax overtook him several moments later.

Iris lay against the cushions breathing hard. She felt totally drained ,emotionally and physically. She tingled all over and her legs felt like they were filled with some kind of fizzy liquid. She didn't think she could stand even if she wanted to. Before Iris could give this much consideration she felt Justin's arms around her as he gently scooped her up and carried her upstairs. He took her into his room and softly placed her on the bed.